An orgasm is a sensation of intense physical pleasure, in which hormones such as oxytocin, endorphins and dopamine are released, also called happiness hormones, because of the well-being they generate, accompanied by rhythmic and involuntary contractions of the pelvic floor muscles.
Of course, this feeling of pleasure is experienced differently by each person. However, it sometimes happens that men and women have had sexual intercourse without reaching orgasm.
The #sinrecato question is: what happens when this occurs frequently?
“Anorgasmia is defined as the absence or delay of orgasm, after a normal arousal phase, during a sexual activity that is considered adequate in terms of the type of stimulus, intensity and duration”, defines Claudia Kösler, sexologist and couple therapist.
There are three types of anorgasmia:
Primary: people who have never felt an orgasm.
Secondary: they have had orgasms, but after a while they have not experienced them again.
Tertiary: they experience them only with a partner or when masturbating.
The expert explains that some people do not always have enough information about their own body and pleasure, especially women. On the other hand, if these people have erotic knowledge and cannot have orgasms, we are talking about anorgasmia.
The lack of sex education, the taboo on sexuality and the little knowledge there is about female sexuality are also factors that influence.
“Women do not come later, they simply have a different physiological rhythm than men”, says Claudia.
It has been proven that the times to reach orgasm when they are alone versus when they are not, change. When they are accompanied, the time is delayed either by lack of confidence, distraction, poor connection or lack of knowledge of the general stimulation.
In the case of men, the tendency is to confuse ejaculation with orgasm. The sexologist clarifies: “Obviously they are two totally different things. In men, ejaculation is the expulsion of semen as a physiological response of the body. On the other hand, orgasm is the ultimate pleasure, but not the end of the sexual practice and it can be felt in more places than just the pelvic area”.
There is also an orgasm without ejaculation, known as delayed ejaculation. This can be intentional by the man to enjoy several orgasms without reaching the expulsion of semen, which requires skill, dexterity, training and practice.
In female ejaculation there is the emission of a clear liquid, almost like water, and sometimes it may contain a little urine. Both can be pleasurable, but the sensations are totally different from orgasm.
An orgasm is a complex reaction to various physical, emotional, psychological and even cultural factors. Difficulties in any of these areas can affect the ability to achieve orgasm.
The causes of this condition are estimated to be 5 percent due to chronic diseases, hormonal problems, neurological alterations, metabolism disorders or endocrine problems, chronic diseases, age and the abuse of alcohol, drugs or pharmaceuticals.
The remaining 95 percent are due to psychological factors such as negative beliefs about sexuality, negative or traumatic sexual experiences, lack of communication with the partner, erotic ignorance, depressive or anxiety disorders, distractions, and lack of concentration.
In addition to these causes, there are cultural and religious factors in which female sexuality is still a taboo subject.
If you have this condition, it is best to consult your doctor and rule out that the cause is physical or psychological and follow the appropriate treatment.
“Orgasm is cerebral, but there are different ways of stimulation to reach it, either through the genitals or other areas of the body”, concludes the sexologist.
Both men and women have the idea that there is a specific moment when the encounter ends and must be reached. The reality is that, in sexual relations, there are no closed moments, both the beginning and the end can only be determined and consented by the couple.
Traducción del español: Catalina Oviedo Brugés.