A study from the University of Virginia, in the United States, recommends that a weekly date alone (very important… Alone!) with your partner strengthens the marriage and reduces the risk of divorce by half.
Experts have always pointed to this simple equation of spending time alone as a couple and quality time as well, where you enjoy each other’s company, without the pressure of schedules or being with the kids, among other factors.
You may wonder, why is dating so important? The answer is simple, because it is an ideal time to strengthen, connect, enjoy and reactivate the relationship and not let it fall, little by little, into the daily routine extinguishing the enthusiasm you feel for each other.
Sociologists have found that dating brings many benefits to the relationship:
1. Better communication: being in a neutral environment allows you to talk without distractions and have conversations of value about what is important to you and motivates you, such as dreams, aspirations and even fears.
For example, by talking about dreams and sharing them, you may find out that you have more in common than you previously thought. If it is a situation that makes you uncomfortable, by being alone you can talk about it calmly, in a conscious way and leave instinctive reactions aside.
The ideal thing is not to go out to discuss, but if the situation comes up, there are always times and ways to solve any situation.
2. Enjoy the new: experts confirm that when couples have been married for a long time, they are very comfortable and no longer feel the same excitement of the early years.
Therefore, the recommendation is to make different plans such as hiking, participating in a marathon, going to a motel, etc. Whichever new plan you make, it will take you out of the daily routine and provide you with excitement, fun and connection.
3. Erotic evening: when a couple is on a romantic plan, they are more relaxed and uninhibited and, of course, they are more sexually disposed, which will allow them to play with their imagination and fan the flame of passion. Just relax and enjoy!
4. Propose plans or dates: it is important that the initiative to go out comes from both of you and that of course, each one suggests a different plan and sets it to be a priority, and not something you do to get it out of the way.
The most essential thing is that the interest is mutual and that each one shows the other that being together is the most important thing.
5. No stress: choosing one day a week or the weekend to be alone frees you from the daily routine of work, family, debts, etc. Do not feel guilty for doing so, after all, couples deserve these spaces to strengthen their relationship. Your health will thank you for it.
Try to make sure that the dates alone are outside the house, because if one of you is tired and gets home, the plan could fail.
Schedule the date ahead of time, taking into account your schedules and whether you need to seek extra help to take care of the children.
Not all plans outside are expensive, many refuse alone time because there is no money. The reality is that to have a good time with the one you love you do not need to be a millionaire.
Less is more, and you can make those sweet plans that connect you to your past emotions and live them intensely in the present.
If the romantic date requires money, do not see it as an expense, but as an investment in your marriage. Life is full of those little moments that are worth enjoying.
Although I am an advocate that the best plans are not the planned ones, I must admit that spending time with your partner exclusively alone is one of the best ways to strengthen your relationship.
Special dates are a pretext, precisely, to show love, just do not wait for those specific days to show how you feel for each other.
Traducción del español: Catalina Oviedo Brugés